Just like last year, I’ll make a collection of resolutions – some of which I’ll stick to, some of which I’ll recommit to in the next ‘Groundhog Year’, presumably until I wake up in bed one morning next to the actress Andie MacDowell…
Continue readingPosts by Jonathan
Twas the Night Before Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the racecourse,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a racehorse;
Seating was placed round the enclosures with care,
In hope that crowds would soon be permitted there…
Join the Search
Excitement is mounting in Kelso this weekend as the cast of Frozen is set to descend on the town to enjoy a pre-Christmas get-together. There’s just one problem. Sven, the reindeer, has gone missing and we’re going to need some help finding him…
Continue reading →Peace and Reconcilliation
It came to pass that in the district of High Holborn, under the governance of the BHA, there came three wise persons saying: “Where are thy manners? For we have heard much evidence and we have decided that thy Weighing Room culture is rancid.”
Continue reading →All Fired Up
The Government frowns on the use of damp wood and smoky fuel in domestic properties because they create microscopic particles, called PM2.5s, which are small enough to pass into the bloodstream and cause health issues.
So it’s a good job that all of the furniture that I hacked to pieces to keep warm this week was completely dry…
Continue reading →Sharing the Love
Regular readers will know this already, but if you’ve clicked on the Border Post in the hope of profiting from the insightful tipping information, you’ve probably missed the point…
Continue reading →All I Want for Christmas…
The pleasure derived from giving the perfect gift can be so good that it’s almost selfish: the warm glow as you witness the recipient’s heart swell in appreciation of something good.
Conversely, the act of searching for the perfect gift can be hell…
Continue reading →A Brief History of Timelords
On Sunday 29th June, 2009, the Cambridge physicist Stephen Hawking sat alone in his wheelchair at Gonville & Caius College, the venue he’d chosen to host his cocktail party for time travellers. To ensure that only real time travellers turned up, he didn’t invite them until at a later date – a strategy which he suggested, when none showed, that time travel probably isn’t possible…
Continue reading →The Best of British
Unlike Geoff Loader I haven’t yet visited every racecourse in Britain, but I’m looking forward to doing so. Geoff, who completed a full house when attending the last meeting at Kelso was presented with a branded beanie-hat for his trouble and, to cheers from an appreciative crowd, immediately declared that Kelso Racecourse was the best of the lot…
Continue reading →Over the Rainbow
The sky in the Scottish Borders is bigger than in other places. Much bigger than in the south of England, for example, where tree shrouded lanes obscure the view; wider than in the Lake District where steep craggy hills hem the horizon, and higher than in the Highlands where tall mountains pierce the blue ceiling.
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